When EMDR Doesn’t Seem to Be Working (And What We Do About It)
EMDR therapy can be incredibly effective — but like any trauma therapy, it doesn’t always feel straightforward.
Some people come in expecting immediate change and instead find themselves wondering:
“Is this working?”
If you’ve had that thought, you’re not alone.
Healing Doesn’t Always Feel Linear
Sometimes, things feel better quickly.
Other times, you might notice:
feeling stuck on a memory
difficulty accessing anything at all
strong emotions that don’t seem to shift right away
This doesn’t mean EMDR isn’t working.
It often means your system needs something different.
There Are Many Ways to Adjust the Process
EMDR is not one-size-fits-all.
If something isn’t moving, we can:
slow down and build more resources
shift the target we’re working on
focus on body sensations instead of memories
adjust the type or pace of bilateral stimulation
You Don’t Need Clear Memories
Some people worry:
“What if I don’t remember enough?”
We can work with:
emotions
body sensations
beliefs
current triggers
Your system already knows where to go.
Understanding When a “Part” of You Might Be Blocking Progress
Sometimes when EMDR doesn’t seem to be working, it’s not because anything is wrong — it may be that a part of you is trying to help in a way that’s getting in the way of the process.
For example, you might notice:
things feel “fuzzy” or hard to access
your mind goes blank when you try to focus
there’s a strong urge to get to a good outcome quickly
it’s hard to just stay with what’s coming up
From an IFS-informed perspective, these are not problems — they are often protective parts of you doing their job.
A part of you might be trying to:
keep you from feeling something overwhelming
stay in control so things don’t feel unpredictable
move quickly toward “feeling better” to avoid discomfort
Ironically, these protective efforts can make it harder to stay open to the process, which is where the healing happens.
Instead of pushing past these parts, we get curious about them.
Starting With What’s Present — Not Just the Past
EMDR doesn’t require you to have a clear memory or a specific image.
We can begin with something you’re aware of in your day-to-day life.
For example:
a part of you that feels responsible for everyone else
a part that shuts down during conflict
a part that feels anxious or on edge
We can start by getting to know that part — how it shows up, what it’s trying to do for you, and what it might be holding underneath.
From there, we often begin to identify:
emotions connected to that part
body sensations
beliefs
or memories that naturally emerge
This creates a more organic path into EMDR processing, rather than requiring you to identify specific memories ahead of time.
Therapy Is Collaborative
If something doesn’t feel like it’s working, we talk about it.
We adjust together.
The goal is not to push through — it’s to find an approach that works for you.
Curious About EMDR Therapy in Denver?
If you’re exploring EMDR therapy, you’re welcome to reach out.
Learn more about EMDR therapy here.
Or contact me to get started.
